Reading Poetry

May 29, 2007 09:05 # 44589

null posts about...

The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

?% | 1

Okay this doesn't claim to be of much intellectual value, but I for one think writing a couple of haiku every now and then is a fun exercise.

(Haiku crash course: a haiku, as we uneducated non-Japanese people know it, is a simple poem consisting of three lines which need not rhyme. The first line is five syllables long, the second seven, and the third line is five syllables again. That's got next to nothing to do with the traditional definition of a haiku as the Japanese know it, but so be it; considering what the Japanese do to words they import from the English language this is a negligible offence.)

So here we go. Considering that 99% of all contemporary Japanese culture concentrates on the art of suffering, I set the topic to be "A Fisherman's Friend in my butt".

Tears roll down my cheeks
My lower back is in flames
Two thousand Scoville!

Nasty hemorrhoids
under considerable pain
will be etched away.

Ants in my bowels
A welding torch in my pants
Candy in my butt!

In the unlikely case that anyone wants to continue, go ahead :-) maybe we can have a haiku jam session or something.

When life hands you a lemon, that's 40% of your RDA of vitamin C taken care of.

This post was edited by null on May 29, 2007.

Jun 06, 2007 08:13 # 44664

null tells about...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

Nobody else want to give it a shot? Well, here we go, if for nothing else then it's for my own amusement. (Do I have a weird taste?)

Flames licking the bowl
no longer constipated
Rear-end laxative.

Don't swallow it whole
or it's gonna burn like hell
when you take a crap.

When life hands you a lemon, that's 40% of your RDA of vitamin C taken care of.

This post was edited by null on Jun 06, 2007.

Dec 14, 2007 11:31 # 45297

Hawkeye *** replies...

I'll give this a shot

?% | 2

My opus:

Peanuts for breakfast
Delicious and nutritious
But feel bad at work

If the world should blow itself up,the last audible voice would be an expert saying it can't be done

Dec 16, 2007 11:41 # 45301

Salvial_Ten *** replies...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

?% | 1

Okay, I suck at this but here we go.

Anus aflame oh
To ease the burning itch so
hopeless. Shit I say!

--Jami Yeah, that's gonna sting in the morning.

Dec 16, 2007 12:20 # 45303

null replies...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

Actually, I think that's one of the better ones!

There's that German proverb, "among the blind, the one-eyed is king", so... :-)

When life hands you a lemon, that's 40% of your RDA of vitamin C taken care of.

Dec 17, 2007 06:55 # 45308

Salvial_Ten *** replies...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

Heh, heh, heh.

--Jami Yeah, that's gonna sting in the morning.

Dec 17, 2007 10:18 # 45310

Hawkeye *** replies...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

Ode to Gelatin
Oh how I watch you wiggle,
Green jello is king.

If the world should blow itself up,the last audible voice would be an expert saying it can't be done

Dec 17, 2007 11:33 # 45312

null wants to know...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

?% | 1

Green jello is king.

But, does it burn well,
and which end does it go in?
Not sure what to think.

When life hands you a lemon, that's 40% of your RDA of vitamin C taken care of.

Dec 18, 2007 13:26 # 45318

Hawkeye *** replies...

Re: The "Fisherman's Friend in my butt" Haiku corner

?% | 1

The real question is:
Would your bowels blast out green?
You don't want to know.

If the world should blow itself up,the last audible voice would be an expert saying it can't be done


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